The countdown.

One year ago at about this time, my life was changed. By Beyonce.

I'm not kidding. If you want a picture perfect painting of a woman with unapologetic strength and incredible beauty, just pop in one of her fabulous CDs. She has taught me the very important aspect of sass in every day life. She has brought truth to my questions of single-hood and empowered me to become a survivor. And yes, I do that believe that girls run the world--did you even have to ask?

Most personal to me, however, is the fact that she taught me to count down. I don't know whether or not you have heard the actual song, Countdown, by Ms. Sasha Fierce--but if you haven't, you should, and you should right NOW. I have posted the youtube link below for your convenience.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XY3AvVgDns

I mean, can an anthem get any better than this? If you want to know how to love someone wholeheartedly while also remaining fiercely independent, Beyonce is most certainly your woman. She makes it all sound so easy and so AWESOME at the same time. You tell me you didn't want to prance around your kitchen in some hott high heels after listening to THAT.

Anyway, the Countdown is mostly meaningful to me because it signifies how much growth can occur in a year. Last fall, I was a struggling person. Actually, I don't even know if you could call me a person at that point in time. It was a tough life, you can take my word for it. I was running after Jesus, for sure, depending on my friends (and therapist), alot, and doing whatever I could to find the spark of life that had seemed to disappear in my soul. But I was dying inside. Slowly, painfully, I was fading into darkness.

And then--a halo appeared.

Now, I know you are thinking I'm being over dramatic, and truth be told--I am . But I really do feel like God sent me the angel of Beyonce to boost my spirits and remind me that, I too, have a Sasha Fierce within me. I have the potential for greatness, respect, and all around kick-ass awesomeness. And what was sweet about the Countdown, was that it was OK that I wasn't quite there yet. That didn't mean I wasn't trying, it didn't mean that I lacked what it took at the time, and it most certainly didn't mean that it would never happen. It was, however, the start of my very own countdown.

I would play this song over and over and over again, until the words no longer held meaning for someone else but for me, Sarah, the girl who had exhausted her options and come up empty so many times before. The girl who never took chances, who accepted life as it was handed to her, who refused to be anything more than what she was for fear of failure.

One year later, that girl does not exist. The countdown has dwindled to one, and Sarah?

She's back. Rocking those high heels and demanding from life all that she so sadly gave up before.

So thank you, Beyonce. Thank you for teaching us to believe in who we are, for reminding us of all we have to offer, and most of all--for teaching us to countdown to the most fabulous version of ourself there is or ever will be.